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| heyyy everyone... finals are done and i'm finished w/ school... beach neone??? | | |
| KT PiLLaH (7:15:06 PM): o boy... i'm asking to get killed
KT PiLLaH (7:15:14 PM): but no i wouldn't do that
KT PiLLaH (7:15:17 PM): should i?... hehehe
cookemnstrz (7:15:44 PM): no you shouldnt ...
cookemnstrz (7:15:46 PM): wwjd
KT PiLLaH (7:17:57 PM): jesus would not do nething even if i did something because jesus loves me, meaning he wants for me what I want for me, because he understands that loving me means accepting me, or else he's not loving me, he's loving himself through me.
KT PiLLaH(7:18:00 PM): did i say that right? .... ::back tracking::
cookemnstrz (7:18:10 PM): haha
cookemnstrz (7:18:24 PM): i meant what would he do in your situation .. not what would he do to get back at you
cookemnstrz (7:18:25 PM): =)
KT PiLLaH (7:18:29 PM): lolz
... jesus and my daddy.... probably the only two men that i know would never let me down..
juss so we all kno....
.... i  tin!!! .... 
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here's one thing about me you should know:
i say what i mean, i mean what i do,
and that is why i can do what i say.
confused? lemme break it down.
i'm trying to live my life by that motto. trying to be stable and force myself
to only speak when i mean something. as long as i remember to be tactful,
i figure that's one way to cut out drama, si? if i only give others the truth,
eventually ppls will relax enough around me to give me the same. or at least that's the logic behind this experiment. though i understand that it will take a longg time for most to feel that comfortable around me, i figure it's worth a shot. anything to stop these empty truths and honest lies.
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"Be sure to keep your eyes open for those dark gifts. They will be some of the best lessons you will ever be fortunate enough to learn."
In all honesty, it feels like my whole life lately has been a dark gift. I find myself too tired to defend myself, my choices, and my actions. What do i want to do, what can i about it? hmm... lolz is it possible to cut people out of your life completely? or how about juss their opinions of you? seriously, i wish life came with a rewind button.
HOWEVER, i do understand that i bring it upon myself, and yes, i am a firm believer in that i have full control of making my own future. my only confusion is this: "what is my point?... what am i trying to learn from this?" | | |
| as i look back on my high school career.... i feel a sense of loss i never expected:: the ups, the downs, the good, and especially the bad... the funni part is, i still don't know what category you fall under......
all i can say is... i'll never forget.
CIHS class of 2004... let's make it happen ; P | | |
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